22 November 2008

sunday scribbings - *grateful*

sunday scribblings prompt for grateful, and continued from last week's prompted writing. thanks to all for reading and commenting! :)

as he stood, he looked down at her and closed his eyes willing himself not to make a sound.

carefully he reached his hand into his pocket and unclenched his fist. he felt the ring slide into the soft material and rest on the bottom.

he turned away and carefully strode out the door, grateful for the darkness and cool night air.
wondered by at

18 comments:

  1. AnonymousNovember 22, 2008 at 4:16 PM

    I'm wondering if (or how soon) he'll be back.

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  2. myrtle beached whaleNovember 22, 2008 at 5:03 PM

    I had to go back and read last weeks entry and I am glad I did. Very nice word pictures.
    Thanks for stopping by my blog.

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  3. Linda JacobsNovember 22, 2008 at 5:19 PM

    Woah, not sure what went on! Very intriguing! Was she dead?

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  4. linda mayNovember 22, 2008 at 7:19 PM

    Sounds to me like he escaped by the skin of his teeth, or did he change his mind, or lose his confidence.
    What happens next?

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  5. Tumblewords:November 22, 2008 at 7:51 PM

    Nicely written - I'm following Myrtle Beached's tip and going back to last week to see what...

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  6. rebeccaNovember 22, 2008 at 8:17 PM

    read last week's prompt as well. beautiful in its sadness, if you can understand that. very well written. i will definitely return to read more of your words....

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  7. lillyNovember 22, 2008 at 10:32 PM

    Very mysterious...

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  8. AnonymousNovember 23, 2008 at 1:18 AM

    is she asleep?

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  9. paisleyNovember 23, 2008 at 4:24 AM

    very nicely done.. i am hoping he holds on to it for quite some time before he thinks again about giving it to her......

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  10. RoanNovember 23, 2008 at 7:41 AM

    I re-read last weeks post. Nice change of view. Now we get to see what 'he' was doing. I still think she's better off without him. He was probably slinking off into the darkness to hide form his guilt. Perhaps we will find out next week...BJ

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  11. MarjaNovember 23, 2008 at 12:36 PM

    Very intriguing Did he take the ring of her?

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  12. Alisa CallosNovember 23, 2008 at 3:01 PM

    Interesting. So many emotions swirl under the surface. Would love to see more of this story!

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  13. Tammy BrierlyNovember 23, 2008 at 4:55 PM

    Will he turn back...hmmm?

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  14. MaryNovember 23, 2008 at 6:33 PM

    Wow! I went back to the previous entry and reread it. These are amazing! You convey such images and so much emotion in such few words. Fabulous!

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  15. meNovember 23, 2008 at 6:49 PM

    thanks to everyone for your kind comments....
    to answer a few of them -- in my mind she's not asleep (though that's an excellent twist i hadn't thought of), i haven't decided if he will return or leave for good, or if they will get back together, or what he will do with the ring (or if it was a new ring or one she had returned)...:-)

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  16. JNovember 24, 2008 at 11:55 AM

    I went back to read the last one, and now this one. How sad. Well done.

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  17. Devil MoodNovember 24, 2008 at 2:57 PM

    At least there is something to be grateful for...I'm glad he found that little detail.

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  18. YvonneNovember 24, 2008 at 9:27 PM

    I'm very intrigued...

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