envisioned

"envisioned"

she feels apart from all of it somehow.
engulfed, entwined, maybe even flattened beneath its weight.
the strength and layers of it holds her.
it forces her down, under where she wants to be.
overnight it changes.
on a whim it changes.
she cannot control how it embraces her.
feelings so vast she is consumed by herself.
and yet completely unable to verbalise it to any other.
it whirrs within her brain.
behind her eyes she sees it all as something completely out of her grasp.
her peripheral vision is shifted.
turned on its own axis.
up becomes under and down is now topside.
she wishes it better, knows it will not, begs it back